Patience

"For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what he already has? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently." (Rom 8:24-25)

Maybe it's the tan from being out in the sun that brings a contrast between skin tone and hair, but my beard is really starting to look good to me. I began growing a full facial beard since the beginning of November. It was all part of supporting our director of youth ministries, Jon Ellegood, in his "No shave November" fun thingy. He didn't need to wait over four months for his beard to come in full. Granted with black hair the beard looks full much faster. Within three weeks his beard looked full. My blonde beard takes a very long time to come in full.

This is the first time I haven't given up on it. My chin beard grows fast and full, but the hair on the cheeks grows in patches. There are lots of bare spots. It s very discouraging and makes me feel somehow lesser. Several times during these four months or so I have considered giving up and shaving. But since I joked about keeping it through April I have hung on to it. I did No Shave November, Dirt-Faced December, Just Go With It January, Fuzzy February, Manly March and... wait for it... Amish April!

I am glad I kept with it. I am starting to like the way it looks. I may keep it longer since it took so long, but probably not. This week I've been struggling with the fast. I feel myself wanting to eat meats and ice cream and drink coffee. I have great natural substitutes, but I really miss feeding my cravings. I begin to say, "What will it hurt?" I haven't quit, but I've wanted to.

My beard finally coming into its own reminded me of what Paul says of hope. Who waits for what he already has? If we hold onto hope in yet gaining our God's promises, we wait for it patiently. Paul is speaking about the greatest promise: resurrection and the new creation. That is way better than a beard! And God offers a foretaste of this bright future through the gift of His presence in the Holy Spirit.

The desire for this future is great and yet I am tempted to partake of short term satisfactions in earthly delights. There's nothing wrong with enjoying this earth and it's goodness. God models that is enjoying His work of creation by seeing it was "very good." He rested and enjoyed the day of Sabbath. We are also to enjoy the work of our hands and celebrate life along with the Lifegiver. My spiritual efforts are lacking and my cravings are pointing to that fact.

But patience with myself and a willingness to wait out this time of self denial will bring a fulfillment of sorts for things hoped for. I hope for a closer walk with God. I hope for health and balance. I hope for God to act to bring breakthroughs into the lives of people around me. And I hope for God's will to be done in the life of His church that we might shine for Him and build His kingdom by adding new hearts.

Lord, teach me patience and humility to wait on You. I need Your grace to support my desire to keep this holy fast. With You all is possible. Amen